There'll be no live-blogging of the IABC show; actually, there'll be no blogging at all while I'm there.
When I'm covering a conference, I'm covering a conference. It's intense. I've got three days to pick up dozens of tips and salient moments to share with Ragan Report readers. I've got to ascertain the mood of the attendees for one RR story, to interview IABC leaders for another, to make witty and wise observations about conference speakers for a column, and to wash it all down with gin. And this year, I'm speaking too.
But being the service-oriented fellow that I am, I have created what I'll call a "crystal blog." Starting Sunday, here's what will be happening at IABC:
• Communicators will be warily walking by booths in the Exhibit Hall, keeping eight feet between themselves and the exhibitors, who they seem to regard as pickpockets. They’ll be smiling politely, but generally using body language that implores the exhibitor: “Please, don’t eat me.”
• Also in the Exhibit Hall, communicators who have come from around the world to be together for one time in a year, will be lined up three deep at banks of wireless laptops, grimly and silently checking their e-mail and checking one another’s blogs.
• Monday morning, a hotel cleaning woman will be in the suite where the Canadian IABCers held their reception last night. She will try to figure out how to get the set of foam moose antlers off the chandelier.
• Everybody will cry at the general sessions. IABC goes for the inspirational stuff at its general sessions, and a session at IABC that does not involve crying is considered a failure. Or at least it would be, if such a session ever occurred. On the evaluation forms for general sessions, IABC asks attenders to rate the amount of crying they did on a scale from one to five. One being, “Misted up a few times.” Five being, “Mascara all down front of blouse.”
• Communicators will ponder the imponderable: Will I really use this IABC tote bag at home? Would it be wasteful to leave it in the hotel room?
• Two or more IABCers will enjoy their annual extramarital affair. They will notice that for some reason the attendant guilt and worry are milder this year in New Orleans than a couple of years ago, when the conference was held in Washington, D.C.
• Brad Whitworth, Wilma Mathews, Angela Sinickas and Shel Holtz will be invisible, because they are surrounded by dozens of brain-pickers. Meanwhile, Charles Pizzo will lead a merry mob of Culinary Pranksters from one insanely good restaurant to the next. And somewhere, Lou Williams will be dancing.
• And a Ragan Report writer will be quietly demanding of himself: “I’m going to be in bed at 12:00 tonight, no matter what.” But so swept up will he be in the human specter of this great gathering of communicators—that’s what he’ll tell himself, anyway—that he’ll close the hotel bar.
Back at you next week in whatever shape I find myself.
Comments (10)
Huh, I've only been able to actually attend one IABC conference (about 5 yrs ago in Chicago) and this sounds pretty much like what it was then too.
Looking forward to your report David. Enjoy the conference!
P.S. Who do you think you're kidding with that "Go to bed at 12:00 thing?
Posted by Kristen | June 22, 2007 7:16 AM
Posted on June 22, 2007 07:16
That's a pretty big wet blanket you've just thrown over all those who heretofore have "enjoyed their annual extramarital affairs." Now they have to wonder who else knows--and who's live-blogging them.
Posted by Jane Greer | June 22, 2007 9:22 AM
Posted on June 22, 2007 09:22
Actually, I don't know anybody who has these affairs, though I may have made some people sweat.
Larry Ragan used to tell tales of annual conference trists dating back to the 1960s; I've always figured if they happened back then, they surely happen now.
As Shakespeare once podcast, "Past is pro-blog."
Posted by David Murray | June 22, 2007 9:26 AM
Posted on June 22, 2007 09:26
This is brilliant, David. Brilliant, I say! I have not attended an IABC Conference since being on my own dime (and didn't go for several years prior), but this pretty well sums up what happens every year. The only difference, I would guess, is the live-blogging aspect.
I told you privately that Les Potter loves your blog. Since he has been unable to do anything that requires Web access since June 1, he has missed reading it. This is one I will print out for him.
Posted by Robert J Holland, ABC | June 22, 2007 10:21 AM
Posted on June 22, 2007 10:21
Good, Robert. Tell him I hated to leave him out of the list of invisible, surrounded IABC honchos.
Posted by David Murray | June 22, 2007 11:33 AM
Posted on June 22, 2007 11:33
He would be the first to say he is always invisible when he's surrounded! I remember during the days when I was a regular IABC conference attender, I could always find Les Potter at the Opening Reception. He was at the center of the biggest crowd.
Posted by Robert J Holland, ABC | June 22, 2007 12:05 PM
Posted on June 22, 2007 12:05
Yep. Les is the hole in the human donut.
Posted by David Murray | June 22, 2007 12:10 PM
Posted on June 22, 2007 12:10
You guys are talking about Les as if he's ill, not just temporarily electronically impaired. Is he okay?
Posted by Jane Greer | June 22, 2007 12:54 PM
Posted on June 22, 2007 12:54
Jane, Les has been hospitalized since June 1 with a persistent medical problem. The good news is he's on the mend and last week moved into a transitional facility that offers round-the-clock nursing care, which he needs right now. He's hoping to come home later this month, if all continues to go well. The bad news is he had to cancel his presentation at the IABC Conference. He also had to back out of teaching during the summer semester, but he is hoping to be back at it in the fall. Anybody who'd like to drop Les a card or letter (which he loves getting) can send them to his home at 1829 Clachan Ct., Vienna VA USA 22182-3425. His wife Marilyn makes regular deliveries to him.
Posted by Robert J Holland, ABC | June 22, 2007 1:32 PM
Posted on June 22, 2007 13:32
Why are you putting someone's name and home mailing address on a blog?
Posted by WTF? | June 24, 2007 12:24 PM
Posted on June 24, 2007 12:24